Recipe for Disaster
by Aleia15
Summary: Nothing good can come up from a meal prepared by Orihime and Maya Fey. PW/Bleach Crossover


**Recipe for disaster **

"Are you sure this is safe, Maya?" Phoenix was looking at her, apprehension clearly written on his face while they climbed up the stairs to Maya's friends flat.

"Of course it is Nick!" She said trying to sound very, very sure.

He didn't look convinced. "Isn't this the girl we had to defend last month for attempted murder? The one who poisoned her boyfriend?"

Maya laughed, "He's not her boyfriend, just a friend. And yes, but she wasn't guilty, she didn't poison him, there are things you don't understand."

He wanted to say something else, something along the lines of that not being the point. It didn't matter that the boy was alive, in Phoenix' book serving a meal of chocolate coated prawns and wasabi soup with sour cherry and cucumber pie _was_ attempted murder.

He really didn't want to be there.

They reached the landing and knocked on the door. Orihime opened it, beaming, and ushered them inside. "Maya, Phoenix, you came! I'm so happy you could make it, I've been trying to get more of my friends to come to have dinner with us but only Kurosaki-kun could come! I have so many things I want to try for tonight!" She launched onto the longest and fastest greeting Phoenix had ever heard.

Maya returned her blinding smile, both of them chattering animatedly on the way inside. They were really similar, the two girls shared a strange love for food. Or a love for strange food, depending on how you looked at it.

Sitting already at the table was the boy, Kurosaki, who had been the victim the time before and seemed not to have learned his lesson. Or maybe he had, judging by the wary looks he was shooting at the pair of girls giggling on their way to the kitchen.

"Kurosaki-kun," Phoenix greeted awkwardly, sitting down on the other side of the table.

The boy nodded sullenly and returned his greeting, his eyes moving from one side to another as if trying to find an escape route.

The door to the kitchen opened and Maya appeared carrying a tray with two dishes, their content something that defied definition. Kurosaki was looking at it as if it was poisonous which, thinking about it, might as well be.

"I'm going to put the steak in the pan, Maya, how do you like it?" Orihime's voice carried from the kitchen.

"Well done, wait, I'm coming! Nick, Ichigo why don't you start with this?"

Maya put the plates on the table and hurried inside the kitchen again. Phoenix studied the food. There was something gelatinous in a shocking apple green colour. It looked radioactive. It also looked way better than the other dish, something twisted and crispy and probably cancerous.

Kurosaki poked it with a chopstick, then showing a greater courage Phoenix had, he took a small piece and popped it into his mouth. He choked immediately, his arms moving desperately looking for something. Phoenix passed him a glass of water and he downed it with a sigh of relief.

"Fried ginger," he said, gasping for breath.

Phoenix nodded making a mental note not to accept more dinner invitation from Maya's friends, whoever it could be. He looked at the green thing, wondering if he should try it and prove he wasn't a coward since Kurosaki had already tasted the other one.

The door opened then and the girls appeared carrying more plates. There wasn't one single thing Phoenix could recognize there, except maybe the steaks though he couldn't figure for the life of him why the sauces covering them were bright pink.

Maya and Orihime kept chatting excitedly, oblivious to their horrified faces.

"Kurosaki-kun, I'm so glad you came, Tatsuki had to train and Ishida-kun was busy, things have been really quiet since the end of--" she trailed off at a pointed glare from the boy and Phoenix wondered what she had been about to say. She recovered quickly and smiled, "Let's eat."

Maya didn't need to be told twice, digging with gusto into the strange assortment. Phoenix poked his food warily and was about to take a bit of his steak when a mobile rang.

The sheer relief on Kurosaki's face while he dug inside his pocket for it was staggering and made Phoenix wish he was anywhere else. Even the Tres Bien sounded like a great place.

"I'm sorry Inoue, I have to go," Kurosaki said standing up. Phoenix glared at him. _Coward._

"Hollow?"

"Espada--probably Grimmjow bored and itching for a fight." He was aiming for looking resigned but it was clear he was glad to have an excuse to go.

The girls didn't notice. With a resigned sigh Orihime nodded, "Go then Kurosaki-kun, and thanks for coming anyway."

Phoenix watched him go, envious and curious about the lucky circumstance allowing him to escape.

"Such a pity," Maya said when the door closed, "well, look at the bright side Nick. More for us!"

…


End file.
